Slaving away at job hunting

You know what? There's a beach outside. One so close that I do not have to pedal for my bike to make it there. Despite that fact, I have to look for a job.

Dr. T started his rotation today, which meant that I was all by myself all day with nothing to do. I woke up at 10, brewed some coffee, felt like a total slacker, and decided I was going to apply for jobs all day long.

A full workday of job hunting.

I've been applying for jobs in bursts since we got to LA. But then Ruble came, and then Shannon came, and then there were weekends, and then there was Game of Thrones, and there's always that beach just down the hill, and my gumption to work all day every day kind of, well, it died.

Today, though, today I got on the job hunt train, full speed ahead. I found a gig through an agency that sounded promising, drafted a cover letter, attached my resume, and sent it on its way.

Now, do that three more times and oh my gosh, I think I can actually hear the ocean waves crashing outside...

Focus. Okay, an interesting position at a swanky hotel. Hmmm, it's a little farther away than I want to go, but it sounds doable. Apply.

At this point I had to complete a seven-part application. A SEVEN-PART APPLICATION. One that required me to attach my resume, then make sure my resume was auto-filled in correctly, then fill out a tax incentive questionnaire, and then answer 43 questions about scheduling and budgeting wisely and having common sense. I got a warning when I started the 43 questions that I had 75 minutes to complete them. 75 MINUTES FOR A JOB APPLICATION THAT I'LL PROBABLY NEVER HEAR BACK ABOUT.

This is the second job application I've filled out that took hours to complete. The last one was kind enough to email me that someone else was more qualified, but only after they required me to get a copy of my college transcript ($12) before they'd consider my application. For that "no," I invested $12 plus three days of content aggregation plus invaluable brain power plus the opportunity cost of time I could have spent on the beach.

I'm a hard worker and I think I come up with some pretty creative ideas. I know I've never left a position in worse shape than I found it, and I know I've been a crisis avert-er at more than one company. I can't help myself when it comes to doing a good job, and I usually end up putting in way more than the people who hire me expected.

But man, looking for a job is worse than working. I quit for today. Besides, there's a beach outside.

Let the visits begin!

Here's what happens when you move away from everything and start over.

The first 30 days you are so busy unpacking and getting your new car registration and scheduling cable service and setting up your new life you can't wait for a day to do nothing.

Then on day 31, once all the chores are done and you're not yet working and your days are full of nothing, you start to fall into a weird depression.

Then on day 38, just as you start to give in to the weepies and start avoiding phone calls from your lovies because it's just too much missing ache when you talk to them, Jessica Ruble shows up.

Ruble had a conference in LA right as the June gloom was rolling in, and she finagled her ticket so we could get some QT together. I think she was here one day before I headed downtown to her hotel, basically sprinted across the lobby, wrapped my arms around her, and refused to let go. The hug may have lasted 8 minutes.

Ruble is like medicine. The last time we moved to LA she was our second visitor, coming just after I'd started my new job but before I'd made any friends (that's a whole other Life Rebuilding Phase, and it usually doesn't start until about day 93). Before this visit, she'd just finished a week in Hawaii, a night in Kentucky, and now that she was in Los Angeles, she was, of course, ready to go, go, go. I think she's got batteries hidden in her body somewhere.

We grabbed a beer at a bar near her hotel and then Mack found a place for us to get some sushi for dinner. Feeling all what the hell!, we ordered a boat of sushi, some sake, and more beer, and I was able to fill up on good belly laughs and one of the friendliest faces I've ever seen. I think we returned her to her hotel at about 1:30am, where she probably went to sleep on a charger.

A couple days later I came and kidnapped her again. After grabbing a beer at the tavern across the street from her hotel, we decided an impromptu trip to a bar an old high school buddy had opened in LA named after Lexington was a great idea. We'd pop in, tell him congrats, have a beer, be good cheerleaders.

As it turns out, it was hip hop night at The Lexington. One rapper had Jesus Christ as a subject, another had vaginal terrorism as a subject, we met one of them named Pookie Ruin, and I claimed P. Shreds as my rapper name. If my album drops it's gonna be sick. There will be lots of rhyming and stuff. Ruble will be my fly girl.

After leaving our mark on The Lexington, we met up with Mack and some jiu jitsu buddies for a late night dinner at one of my favorite diners. And, because this is LA, we met Jesus Christ there.

I'm not sure if it was appropriate to Mark Katherine him with an armpit self-smell and impulsively shout "Superstahh" as he walked up to the diner entrance, nor if it was cool to throw a JC gang sign in the photo with him, but Jesus was totally forgiving. He was the nicest guy ever, not judgy or annoyed or damning, but just a-okay with everything. If the Sky Daddy version of Jesus ever does show up, he should take lessons from Hollywood Jesus on how to be a good Jesus in the modern times.

By the time we released our hostage, it was 3:30 in the morning, and poor, sweet Ruble had to work another day at her conference. Somehow she managed to recharge and on Friday, she was mine, all mine!

I captured her from her hotel and brought her to our place on the beach for a weekend of wandering.

I just realized it looks like we're always in the same clothes... the hazards of hoodie weather!

We walked up the to the beach and watched the surfers. Then we came upon a bar I'd been wanting to check out called the Underground. Then we stumbled into our neighborhood saloon and watched a hockey game (fortunately Ruble knows about hockey so I didn't have to be a complete idiot). We basically just kept putting one foot in front of the other, talking about everything under the sun, stopping at places that looked interesting.

And that's when we found Ol' Tony's, what could be the most incredible dive bar I've ever been to in my life. Sure, it smells a little like vomit when you first walk in, but Manny makes a mean Old Fashioned for $6 and you can watch the sunset since it's perched on the pier. The food is atrocious, but the people watching is incredible, and I plan to take all future guests to Ol' Tony's, like it or not (assuming it doesn't get torn down).

The same up-for-anything spirit that inspired us to go into Tony's also inspired the hike we took. I'd read about a shipwreck hike nearby and wanted to check it out, but Mack is hit or miss with hikes. Since Ruble is a hiking champion, I knew she'd be a blast even if the hike sucked.

We started out at the top of a gorgeous cove full of surfers down below. We walked over some smooth stones that crackled like thunder when the water flowed over them back out to sea. We saw old fire pits and people fishing.

It started off beautifully, but after the first turn we discovered sea roaches skuttle bugs. These dinosaur ages beefy bugs were all over the tops of the rocks, and when you got close they'd scamper under them. There were so many it looked like the ground was alive. I totally had the heeby jeebies (which is why I had to quit calling the sea roaches and give them a cute name like skuttle bugs), but Ruble was undeterred.

We walked along the rocks for a couple miles when we finally started to see bits of the shipwreck. Huge pieces of rusty iron stained the beach, but nothing resembling a ship. We decided we'd pose as spotters who'd have said "Land Ho!" or whatever people say before they crash. Well, I'm slow. We fail as spotters.

Luckily a couple of guys came around the bend and let us know there was cooler stuff up ahead, so our dorky didn't get too out of control. We walked another half mile and there it was. A real live shipwreck.

Thanks to Ruble, I think I'll make it to day 93 without any anti-depressants. If only I could get some of her energy...