First I went to Natural Bridge. Then I dreamed it was blindingly foggy and I had to walk across that plank of death.

For St. Patrick's Day, we decided to go to the Gorge and do a little hiking, maybe meet up with our friends Lena and Dustin. Lena and Dustin are rock climbers, probably world famous ones but because they are in Kentucky, you'd never know it. Isn't that weird how people can be heroes elsewhere and completely ignored in Kentucky? I'm looking at you, Sam Shepard.

Anyway, since it was Spring Break, we got up about 1, finally got to the Gorge around 2, then Mack had to eat tofu pizza at a place called Miguel's, and finally at about 3 we started the hike to Natural Bridge. Mack had never been there before and it'd been almost a decade since my last visit, so it was awesome. Maybe the degree of awesome has something to do with how drunk on sunshine I was, but for now, I'm giving all the credit to Kentucky. You hear that Kentucky? I have given you one point for your combination of tofu pizza, beautiful scenery, and sunshine. Relish in it.

The type of proud a 1-mile hike will get you.

Still have no idea how this was formed? Anyone?

Nature's Size Restrictions

I did not have to turn sideways to fit through this thing. That was nice. Even though I look like a fat ass in this picture.

Fearless. Because he does not have a built-in toochie alert system.

Crack kills. So do ledges.

Taking it in like a leisurely Daniel Boone.

This was nothing after those bridges in Ghana.

After the hike, we found some spotty cell phone reception and caught up with Dustin and Lena, who'd been in the throes of a plumbing disaster all day. We went with them for a "soda pop" and ended up at "a gigantic rock wall on the side of the road that I had no clue existed even though we'd driven past it 3 times." It's called Road Side. It is beautiful.

They wanted to scramble in a climb before the sun went down, so we craned our necks and watched these spider monkeys go where no man was meant to go. Then I took a turn.

This is half of the madness of Road Side.

About a million waterfalls above and below us.

And they're off.

And off some more, all the way to the top!

Dustin makes it look harder than Lena but easier than it is.

My turn! Yeah, there aren't any ropes. Yeah, I'm all of 2 feet off the ground.

Mack dreaming big.